Small loss

How do you mourn the loss of something that should be inconsequential. Something that was only a blip on the timeline of relationships in my life. 

Yet, I think while I'll miss the way he could make me laugh and the fact that he would give me the last piece of dessert--I think I feel am grieving the unfulfilled possibilities. 

I let myself open up and hope. I dropped my walls and tried to let the sunshine creep past the broken rubble. 

I let myself envision the prospect of a family. I tried to think about what life would look like with children, even though it had never been a possibility before. 

Tonight I get to go to belly dancing class, tomorrow I speak at an event about body image, the day after I spend the evening with friends, the next day I spend with coworking with a group of fierce fabulous women and the next day and the next are all filled with loving people and the work I want to do and yet...

I know that I'll move on and I'll go back out into the wide world of dating but I'll pause for a moment and feel. 

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